I Swear...Forever and Ever, Amen

Today we got up at the crack of dawn to head to our consulate appointment across town. I didn't sleep at all, I was so nervous that we might be late or miss our appointment. Of course we got there just and were about 30 minutes early, better safe than sorry.

I won't lie, it was a bit stupid. There were 10 families there at the 8:30 time slot and we had to take this oath as a group to love and care for our kids. After all we have gone through this year to bring this kid home, that's it?

But as I said it, I couldn't help but think that according to statics at least one of those families would disrupt their adoption and give that child away.

For those not in the adoption world that may sound horrible and let's be real, it is! But in the adoption world it's the reality. People promise to love this child forever, pay $30,000 only to give the child up. I have to ask the question, "If this was your bio kid would you give them up?" The answer is, "of course not," yet people think it's okay to give up an adopted child.

I cry bullshit. I don't care what Jack and Isaac do. They are me, I am them, giving them away would be like cutting away my body parts and throwing them away. I can not imagine a world without them, NO MATTER WHAT THEY DO! I will always stand by them and be their mother and be there for them. Those that can't or won't do that, shouldn't be parents. There is ALWAYS a way to parent even if you need help. There is always a way to find a fix and still be their parent! Yes this is harsh, but it is my opinion. You give birth for life, you adopt for life.

Okay off my soap box. I just lost half my readers, but I don't care! It needed to be said.

After the consulate we met Joy and Stefan (another awesome family) with their adorable daughter. Then we met Ann for a little shopping. She is amazing and knows her way around and got us amazing prices! Jack carefully picked out a pearl necklace to give his wife one day!

After shopping we rocked a little swimming till it started to rain, then had tea at the hotel. Subway for dinner, a little Breaking Bad for mom and dad, a little packing, and it was off to bed. We plan to sleep in tomorrow, hit the pedestrian street, pick up Jack's passport and visa, and buy some books in mandarin for him. Then we pack and leave at 6am for the airport to come home on Friday.

We are ready for home. Over tea we were reflecting about how amazing the last 15 days have been. We could not in a million years have dreamed this trip would be so beautiful and life changing. People dream of adoption stories like this and we have been fortunate to live it.

Enjoy the photos!

Going Rogue in Guanghzou

So I should start this blog by telling you all how much I LOVE my agency.  WACAP has been incredible and if we were to ever adopt again we would go through them again.  They have been above the bar on EVERYTHING.  Now that being said, I like to control my own fate.  I like to make my own plans, schedule my own life, so when it was time to book travel for Jack's adoption, I went rogue.  I told WACAP from the beginning that I would book my own travel, drivers, translators, and get myself around.  I only needed them for our adoption-related appoinments.  Many people said we were nuts.  Others had tried to go rogue in the past and failed.  But I was determined to not only prove you could do it, you could do it well.  I should mention that going rogue saved us about $2400 in travel expenses. 

I have a previous blog about getting around Hong Kong!  I will post another time about Beijing.  Today is about how to get around Guangzhou, get to your appointments on time and do it all for less than $10/day.

Here goes.  Steer clear of the taxis.  They are great, but the traffic is bad.  ALL of your appointments can be accessed easily by subway and it will cost you $.50/per person per trip!  First I will start with if you are staying at the Victory, then the Garden.

1.  Download the subway app by mx data for Guangzhou Subway.  It is free and once downloaded you don't need wifi and can use it in the city.  You can choose a starting station and an ending station and it will tell you where to go, when to transfer, and how much it will be.  I have used it a million times. 

2.  Medical appointment with your child. 
From the Victory turn left out the front door. 
Walk down to the end of the road and cross over the river.  Go up and over the sky bridge and you will be standing right in front of the HUANGSHA subway station.  This is Line #1 (Yellow line). 
Follow the signs (all in english), ask for change at customer service and buy your ticket.  You will be going to ZHUJIANG NEW TOWN station on Line #3 (Orange line).   
Get on the train headed towards Guangzhou East Railway station.  Go 8 stops to YANJGJI station and follow the signs to Line 3.  This is where you are transfering from yellow to orange.  It is not scary, just follow the signs.  This is all VERY laid out and in ENGLISH.  Just follow the signs. 
Then take the #3 Line towards Panyu Square and go 2 stops to ZHUJIANG NEW TOWN. 
Exit the station and look to your left. The building you are looking for is #59 East side on the 5th floor.  It is right there next to the subway exit. 
Reverse the directions to go home.  Total transit is like 25 minutes and will cost you $2 USD.

3.  Consulate appoinment.
Same as the Medical, head to the Huangsha subway station from the island (see above).
Buy your tickets. You are going to the Guangzhou East railway station exit.  This is the last exit on the Yellow line or Line #1.
Get on the train towards Guangzhou East railway station.  Find a seat.  Stay on the train for 11 stops till it gets to Guanzhou East.  This is the last stop on the line.  Get off and head for exit F.
Once you exit look for the Ikea next door.  The consulate is in the building next to Ikea.  Plain as day, right there. 
This is EASY to find.  Just follow the signs and look for the giant blue building when you exit.  Head towards the yellow/blue glow and there you are!
Total transit time 23 minutes, cost=$.65

4.  Six Banyan Tree temple.
Same as above.  Hit the Huangsha Subway station.  Head towards Guanzhou East.
Go 4 stops to GONGYANQIAN station.
Take exit I2 out of the station.
When you exit, go straight for two "main" blocks. You will pass a ton of electronic stores.
Turn right at the second intersection and just walk about 2 more blocks.  It is on the left.  It is beautiful ... worth the $.75 to get in.  A must see. 
Reverse directions to get home.

Now for the Garden you will start at TAOJIN station which is right in front of the garden.  You will need to take this line (the Red line, Line #5) to Yangji station which is 3 stops down.  At Yangji you can transfer to the Yellow line or Line #1, which is the one you will take from the Victory.  Once you are on the Yellow line or Line #1 follow the directions above for each location.  Again everything is in English!  Just follow the signs.  If you can read you can do this.  Don't be afraid to rock the public transportation.  I would say the GZ subway is as easy as the Hong Kong subway. 

I can tell you, I was nervous about going rogue.  By doing what we did, we were essentially on our own for all things that were not adoption related, and we had to get ourselves to all our appointments.  Yet with a little planning and being prepared for anything, we have had the most wonderful trip.  We have been on time to all our appointments and had zero issues.  WACAP has been supportive and wonderful in allowing me to control everything.  Their in-country staff has been great and I would do it again in a heartbeat. 

Please let me know if you want more info on how to navigate the system here on your own.  I can help you find your way to the safari park, restuarants, the island, just let me know where you want to go.  Also for each location I was headed to, I had the Victory write the name of the location in chinese so that if we were lost we could show the address to someone on the street and find where we were going.  People are great about pointing you in the right direction.  I highly recommend you do this, so that if the crap hits the fan you can jump in a cab and find your way home.  Better safe than sorry!  I will post tomorrow about the great debate of "the Victory vs. the Garden"...

Enjoy the photos.

The Great International Tea Incident

So we survived our first week with Jack like pros. This kid is great. He shows none of the typical orphan behavior. No biting, hitting, kicking, spitting, screaming, running off, ect. This is normal behavior for a child that has had to survive in an orphanage.

Jack is a, "go with the flow 10 year old" with a very tender heart. I know inside he is grieving, and we will be dealing with that through counseling when we get home (like we did with Isaac), but so far he has shown nothing but excitement.

Yesterday we got to meet up with another adoptive family staying a few doors down the hall. They are also with WACAP so it's fun to swap stories. We had a big lunch so we decided to eat a smaller dinner.

Well after ordering two entrees that were no long available, we finally got our meal which was okay (NOT awesome cheap hutong food). When the bill came it was about 60 RMB or $10 more than it should have been. I questioned the bill and was informed (with the worst English ever) that we were charged for tea that not only were we never served, we never asked for.

Steve got heated, I said "hell no", and asked for the manager. They called the owner who informed me that this is a tea house where it is a mandatory fee for tea even if you don't drink it. I told him that should be explained and then this would not be an issue, we would have drank $10 tea but since it was not, he should take care of it.

Sure enough we won that argument, vowed to never go back, and to tell our friends to steer clear. They adjusted the bill for us and we paid for our over priced food, wishing we were back in Beijing where we ate for $20/day!

Then a waiter came over and was talking to Jack. He was having none of it. We high tailed it out of there and swore off expensive looking restaurants forever!

Today we had breakfast in the hotel, and headed out by taxi for Jack's medical. It was such a waste of time. Did you know his back is crooked, "holy shit seriously!!! I never noticed". Did you know he is skinny, "OMG really?"

Not sure what the point it, but it made me laugh! We are ready for home. Guangzhou is just not the same as HK and Beijing. It is expensive here, though the island we are staying on is very laid back and chill, but again still expensive.

We are on the hunt for good cheap food like we had in Beijing but so far that would be a whole lot of nothing!

After the medical we hit the subway and found the 6 banyan tree temple. It was beautiful. It was the one thing I really wanted to see in GZ and I am glad we made the trip. Jack knew exactly what to do when he was near a Buddha, it was very cool to watch. He really is a sweet and thoughtful kid.

After the temple we hit the subway back to the hotel. We hung out for a bit then Jack and I headed to Tekila's for some food and conversation with other adoptive families. It was a really nice evening.

On Tuesday we had nothing to do, so I dropped of some laundry, stood in the bank for an hour and a half to change money, then we went shopping. We got most of our gifts in the shops on the island. All of this was followed by swimming, dinner, and we got to bed early.

We are off to the consulate this morning! See ya on the flip side!

Platform 9 3/4

Today we said goodbye to Beijing and hello to inter-country train travel. We were in the #7 coach, #2 cabin of the T97 train from Beijing to Guangzhou.

We bought the extra bed so that we didn't have to share with a random Chinese dude. Best decision we ever made. The cabins were small and to share with someone we didn't know would have been bad news. We are already the circus side show ... the last thing we need is to be stared at for 21 hours.

Ping drove us to the train and walked us inside and showed us around. He was able to use our extra ticket to get inside the station. We had some lunch and waited in the VIP section! Hell yeah soft sleeper!

Then the insanity began as everyone with seat tickets rushed to get good seats. We got swept into the crowd. Jack kept pointing us in the right direction. We found our coach and found our cabin. Jack was smiling from ear to ear. He was so excited.

Note to those that will follow in our footsteps. When they call to board the train, just stay seated and wait for the mob to go. They are racing for good seats, whereas our cabin is assigned, so there is no rush! Trust me on this!

We left at exactly 1:08 pm. This is my first overnight train. It was very calm and the sway of the train was so much better than the turbulence of a plane.

I fell asleep for an hour and a half almost immediately. I was exhausted. I think I was so scared we would screw this up. Our adoption agency thought we were a little nuts to take a train so far across China and the people who booked the tickets asked us about 4 times if we were sure. "Tickets cannot be refunded if you buy ... you buy, you ride, or you walk!"

But we made it. Jack was having the time of his life and we were just happy to be on an adventure.

Train car 1 had the engine, 2 was a luggage car, 3-6 were hard sleepers (6 beds per cabin, no door, smoking, smells you can't imagine, bad toilets! Then 7-9 are soft sleepers, 4 beds each cabin, with doors ... and very quiet. No one in the halls (this is where we were). Car 10 is the deluxe soft sleepers. These have 2 beds with private bath. Very very nice. If it had just been Steve and I, we would have gone this route. But we needed the extra room. Car 11 is the food car, 12-15 are more hard sleepers, and 15+ are the seats. There is a guard at the door to keep people from coming and going in these cars. The seat cars are packed to the brim! I think a seat will cost you about $35+, hard sleeper is $75+, soft sleeper bed is $130, and deluxe is $190.

I cannot imagine sitting in a seat for 21 hours with people smoking, yelling, and some seriously bad hygiene!

Our train ride consisted of UNO, Chinese checkers, comic books, video games, naps, snacks, drawing, booze (Steve got a bottle of vodka for $.80!!!).

We bought some pre-packaged dinners off the cart for $3.25/piece. Pretty good too. It totally felt like we were going to hogwarts!

After watching Harry Potter 4 (seemed appropriate), we fell asleep around 10:30. The train made two stops in the night to let people off. We all seemed to sleep like babies. The beds were not "soft" but they did the trick.

We got up, packed, had some noodles for breakfast, and enjoyed the last three hours of our journey. The train was about an hour and a half behind schedule when we arrived in GZ. Yet a late train felt easier to deal with than a delayed plane, probably because you can lay down, go to the bathroom, make some noodles!

Wow what a great experience. It was one of the best decisions made when planning this trip. Saved us about $400 and it was a lot of fun. I truly look forward to doing it again one day.

We took a taxi to the Victory from the train station. This was also a first for us. We have used subways, ferries, buses, or Ping to get around up to now. While we are in GZ we will be using taxis and maybe the subway to get around. We could not find a taxi that would run the meter. But we negotiated the driver down and off we went! To be kidnapped or taken to our hotel we didn't know!

We made it to the Victory and checked in. It is beautiful. More on that later. Showers, lunch, and a trip to the pool, finished us off for the day. Enjoy the pictures!